Whilst the majority of Chiswickians wouldn’t dream of living any where other than our wonderful enclave, forum members have been busy this week listing what they would put in W4’s Room 101 should Paul Merton coming knocking.

With subjects ranging from parking to parents, below are just some of the highlights of the discussion started by Brian Brennan:

• Bittersweet feeling of being torn between wishing the butchers and grocers on Turnham Green Terrace wouldn't park their damn vans on the road and constantly block the traffic yet at the same time feeling obligated to let them off as we should all support local organic businesses
• Chiswick main post office
• Chiswick mummies who believe that their little angels are just expressing themselves as they charge around restaurants screaming.
• Chiswick pavements - minefields of potholes and broken slabs
  Chiswick High Road lake, every time it rains
• Chiswick restaurants/pubs serving hot food on cold plates
• Cyclists on pavements
• Drivers who don't thank other drivers when given way to on a narrow street or at an awkward junction.
• Drivers who park their cars straddling two spaces.
• E3 Buses
• Foxtons Minis
• Hounslow Council
• How quickly these entries [forum threads] veer completely away from the main idea into slagging off previous entries for poor grammar, spelling, snobbishness, whatever.
• Huge advertising billboards
• Mud in Chiswick House
• People that wear sunglasses when it's dark. You’re not famous so why?
• People who walk their dogs off the lead
• Pushchairs everywhere
• Restaurants serving food on plates that are too hot and burn your hands when you touch them
• Restaurants that include tips on the chip and pin machines when paying for a bill but with an option to cancel if you don't want to leave a tip. You then find the button isn't marked so you have to ask the waiter where the cancel button is.
• Sainsburys - with its location & range of food it should be great, but for some reason it just isn't quite there, is it?
• That totally faceless bit of road from the VW garage up to where all the good curry houses are on King Street that means it’s just a little bit too far to go to King Street for a curry of an evening.
• Those kind of women who you see walking down the High Road who just look like they don't care about the economy and interest rates as their husbands bought their houses for cash (dahling) and can't control their kids as they barely know their names and "surely that’s what the polish nanny is for ?".
• Thugs hanging round the bus stop in groups
• Too many good restaurants so you can't go to any of them often enough
• Traffic lights outside Gunnersbury Station which always seem to be red on the High Road, even though the flow of traffic from Chiswick Park is minimal
• Trying to drive past the shops on Fauconberg Road, it's effectively a one-way street.
  

January 16, 2008